Crash Test with Rob and Paul

surprise guest: AZIZ ANSARI!

man, he fuggin KILLED. he's too fuckin hilarious. thing is, right before the show, i was telling one of my comedy buddies to check out laughyourdickoff.com (a site that is dedicated to a character Aziz played in Funny People). i've even told my PARENTS about this guy.

rob huebel and paul scheer were fuggin solid too. nick thune i saw about a year ago at the laugh factory, he delivered again last night.

man, these comedy people are a little too funny.

wrap

is the english word for "crappy burrito"

bourgeois pig

potential tag lines for this coffee shop

"dimly lit, so we never have to clean up"

"we employ try-hard baristas"

"barista washes hands once for every six visits to the bathroom"

"crappy coffee shop"

"shitty shithole"

"the gem of hollywood"

Man, these allergies are killer... NO PUN INTENDED

fun fact: i've almost died TWICE cuzza my allergies

where eczema ends...

...acne begins

He was my opener at an open mic

I saw this on Seinfeld the other night, and I lost it.

Irrera [another comic] is talking about his nostrils enlarging.

Seinfeld: Oh, is this a bit?

Irrera: HEY! I don't do "bits." ...I'm a prop comic.

I think my right eyebrow is in a completely different place than where it should be.

sigh.

"The people you work with are people you were just throw together with. You know, you don't know them, it wasn't your choice, and yet you spend more time with them then you do your friends or your family. But probably all you've got in common is the fact that you walk around on the same bit of carpet for eight hours a day. And so, obviously, when someone comes in who you... you have a connection with... yeah."

--Tim Canterbury

a text from last night

"the cab driver's dick is outta his pants!"

so... i'm gonna post some stuff on this from time to time

I often frequent the craigslist personals section for research. I found this  gem on there the other day.  He followed the number one rule of advertising: be succint.